Back in September last year we were given access to a Canadian egg donor database following a consultation with a surrogacy agency. We had had a series of weekly calls which included talking to a solicitor, a clinic and I remember during a chat with the CEO of Egghelpers, he said to browse the database and see what you like.

At the time I didn’t think much of it because we would need donor eggs to create embryo’s and I was more focused on finding out how much everything would cost. When we eventually got around to looking through the profiles two things struck me; 1. We were choosing who are kid(s) could look like, and what would turn out to be disappointing for us; 2. We wouldn’t know them – maybe only what was written in her profile – family history, characteristics, likes and dislikes, education, etc.

In my pragmatic planning I’d assumed it was an inconsequential choice we had to make, pick from a list we both ‘like’ but the more we talked about it, it was a fundamentally important decision we needed to make. After that my husband and I began having nightly discussions on our walk and asked questions like:

  • Should we ask someone we know?
  • If we went with a Tinder Egg, how would we feel about it?
  • Should we use an egg bank in Canada or try one closer to home?

Right now, we’re taking our time to find the right one and I’m really glad we’re taking this time to make the right decision. I think it will mean everything in the long term.

RM

#surrogacy

Blogging about a surrogacy journey my husband and I began in 2021.